What to ask a homeowner who's behind on payments: 5 steps for the first call

KW Default Solutions

Last updated October 30, 2026

An agent's guide to the first conversation: what to ask, what to listen for and what never to promise.

If a homeowner tells you they're behind on the mortgage, the first call is where you listen, get a few facts and agree on one next step. Before you talk about what to do with the house, find out what they want.

This guide gives you five steps, words you can use and a list of things never to say. It covers a call the homeowner has agreed to. It doesn't cover how to reach out to a homeowner who hasn't contacted you.

01What words should you know before the call?

• Servicer: the company that collects the payments and handles the loan. It isn't always the company that owns the loan.
• Repayment plan: the lender lets the homeowner pay the past-due amount in smaller pieces, along with each regular payment. [4]
• Forbearance: the lender lowers or pauses the monthly payments until a set date. [4]
• Loan modification: the lender changes the terms of the loan to make it more affordable. [4]
• Title: legal ownership of the home. Title records show who owns it.
• Lien: a legal claim on a property for a debt.
• Equity: the home's value minus the debts secured by it. Estimated sale proceeds: the money that may be left after those debts and the costs of selling are paid.
• Payoff: the amount needed to pay off a loan in full on a certain day.
• Preliminary title report: a report from a title company that lists who owns the home and what claims are on it.

02What should you do before you call?

A few minutes of prep keeps you from guessing.

• Look up the property in public records so you know who's on the title.
• Check the county for any foreclosure filings and the dates they were recorded. Records can be out of date, so treat what you find as a starting point.
• Get a rough idea of the home's value from recent nearby sales.
• Review your state's foreclosure basics so you know what a filing usually means there.
• Have the name and number of a housing counselor ready to share. Look for one approved by the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD). The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB), a federal agency, has a tool to find a housing counselor near the homeowner. [2] The HOPE Hotline, (888) 995-HOPE (4673), is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week. [1]
• Have a place ready to take notes.

03What are the 5 steps of a first call?

1. Ask if it's OK to talk. Let the homeowner stay in control.
2. Explain your role. You're an agent, not an attorney.
3. Find out what they want. Keep the home, sell it or not sure yet.
4. Ask about notices, dates and immediate concerns. Get the facts on any letter and any deadline.
5. Agree on a next step. Keep it small and specific.

04The 5 steps, one by one

Step 1: Ask if it's OK to talk about it

Don't jump straight into questions about money. Ask first.

This tells the homeowner they're in control of the conversation.

Step 2: Explain your role

Be clear about what you do early. It protects the homeowner, and it protects you.

Homeowners may be wary of anyone who calls about a late mortgage. California Courts warns that fraudulent companies search public records to "offer help" to borrowers who miss payments, then take their money and do nothing to help. [3] That's one more reason to say clearly who you are and what you can't promise.

Step 3: Find out what they want

This is the most important question in the conversation. Do they want to keep the home, sell it or are they still figuring it out?

Their answer shapes what comes next.

• They want to keep the home. You may not be the right person to help right now, and that's OK. Point them to their servicer and a HUD-approved housing counselor. A counselor can help them look at options like a repayment plan, forbearance or a loan modification, and can help them talk to the servicer. [1] They may call you back if things change.
• They want to sell. Go through Step 4, then use the facts list in "What do you need to know if the homeowner wants to sell"
• They're not sure. Give them information and time. Offer a counselor's contact information and agree on when you'll talk again.

Listen to how they say it. A homeowner who says, "I just want this to be over," may be heading toward a sale. One who says, "I think I can catch up if I get two more months," may need to talk to the lender first. They can look the same on paper, and they need different next steps.

Also notice who else is involved. If the homeowner keeps saying "we" but you're only talking to one person, ask who else is on the title. A spouse, an ex-spouse or a family member may need to be part of the decision.

Step 4: Ask about notices, dates and immediate concerns

You need to know what the homeowner has received and whether anything has a deadline. Ask gently. Some homeowners haven't opened their letters, and that's OK.

• "Have you gotten any letters from your lender, a law firm or the court"
• "Do any of them have a date on them, or mention a deadline"
• "Have you talked to your lender about this yet? What did they say"
• "Is anything worrying you right now that we should deal with first"

What a homeowner says about a letter doesn't tell you where they are in the process. The document does, and so does the official record. For any notice, get four things: the exact title, who sent it, the date on it and any deadline it states. Then check through the right source.

Here's what to do next when you hear some common things. Every state is different, so use this table to decide what to ask next. It isn't a way to tell the homeowner what their letter means.

If they mention a sale date or any deadline, slow down. If you're not sure what it means, get help from your broker or an attorney.

Step 5: Agree on a next step

Before you hang up, agree on what happens next. Keep it small and specific, and ask how they'd like you to follow up.

If they're not ready, that's OK. Thank them and ask if it's alright to check back in. If they say no, respect it and make a note.

If you're going to see their documents, handle them with care. Loan numbers, account details and Social Security numbers don't belong in casual texts or unsecured email. Use the method your brokerage uses for sensitive documents, and tell the homeowner what it is.

Then write down what happened on the call:

• The date, the homeowner's name and the property address
• Who's on the title
• What they want: keep, sell or not sure
• Notices they've received: the title, the sender, the date and any stated deadline
• Immediate concerns
• Rough numbers they gave you
• Referrals you offered
• How they agreed to be contacted
• The next step and its date

05What do you need to know if the homeowner wants to sell?

If selling is on the table, you'll need some facts before anyone talks strategy. You don't need every number on the first call. Here's what you're working toward and why each piece matters.

If they don't know exact numbers, that's normal. Rough answers are fine for now. You'll check the real numbers later with a payoff statement and a preliminary title report.

06What should you never say to a homeowner who's behind?

Stay away from anything that sounds like a promise, even when you're trying to make them feel better. Don't say:

• "I can stop the foreclosure."
• "The bank will approve this."
• "This won't hurt your credit."
• "You won't owe anything after the sale."
• "You definitely have time."

You don't know any of that. Promises like these can hurt the homeowner if they turn out to be wrong, and they can cause real problems for you and your brokerage. Even a HUD-approved housing counselor can't promise that a homeowner will keep the home. [1]

Scare tactics add pressure to a homeowner who's already anxious, so skip those too. And don't push anyone to sign something on the first call. If your brokerage requires a disclosure or paperwork, explain what it is and give them time to read it.

If a homeowner asks about one of these directly, it's fine to say you can't predict it and that it depends on their situation.

07How do you handle hard moments?

They get emotional. Slow down. You don't need to fix it right then. Something as simple as "This is a lot. We can take it one piece at a time" is enough.

They ask, "Can you just buy my house" Be clear about your role. You're an agent, and you can help them look at what the home could sell for. If they want to hear from investors, they should know what the home could sell for on the open market first, so they can compare.

They're angry at the lender. Let them vent for a minute. Then bring it back to what they can control, like opening the letters, gathering their numbers and talking to a counselor.

They want an answer you can't give. Say so, and tell them who can answer it. Legal questions go to an attorney and tax questions go to a tax professional. For questions about options for keeping the home, a HUD-approved housing counselor is a good place to start. [1]

08What does a good first call sound like?

This conversation is made up, including the names and numbers, but it's how a good first call might sound.

Agent: Hi Linda, thanks for calling me back. Would it be alright if I asked a few questions about what's going on? You can skip anything you don't want to answer.

Homeowner: Sure. I'm just not really sure what to do.

Agent: First, I want to be upfront. I'm a real estate agent. If selling is something you want to look at, I can talk through what that could look like, and I can point you to people who help with the rest. I'm not an attorney, and I can't promise how any of this turns out.

Homeowner: OK, that's fair.

Agent: If everything went the way you wanted, what would happen with the house?

Homeowner: Honestly, I think we need to sell. My husband's job ended in the spring, and we just can't keep up.

Agent: I'm sorry, that's a hard spot to be in. Is your husband on the title with you?

Homeowner: Yes, we're both on it.

Agent: Good to know. We'll want to make sure he's part of these conversations too. Have you gotten any letters from the lender or the court?

Homeowner: One came last week. I haven't really read it.

Agent: That's OK. If you're comfortable, could you open it and tell me who it's from, what the date on it is and whether it mentions a deadline? I don't need any account numbers.

Homeowner: Okay, hold on. It's from the lender. It says it's about the past due payments. I don't see a deadline, but there's a phone number to call.

Agent: Thank you. I'd still like to see the whole letter, since a deadline can be easy to miss. I'll tell you how my brokerage takes documents safely, so you don't have to text a photo. Is that OK?

Homeowner: That's fine.

Agent: Do you know about how much you still owe on the house? A rough number is fine.

Homeowner: Maybe around two hundred sixty thousand? We also have a home equity loan, I think about twenty.

Agent: That helps a lot. I'll pull some recent sales nearby so we can see what the home might sell for. Is it OK if I call you Thursday afternoon, and we'll go through the letter together?

Homeowner: Yes, that works.

Agent: One more thing. Would it help if I sent you the name of a HUD-approved housing counselor? Their foreclosure prevention counseling is free, and they can help you look at your options with the lender.

Homeowner: Yes, please. That actually helps. Thank you.

Here's what the agent did. They asked permission, explained their role, checked for a deadline and offered a counselor. They kept sensitive documents out of a casual text, asked about the second loan and the co-owner and agreed on one next step. They made no promises, put no pressure on Linda and asked her to sign nothing.

09FAQs about talking to a homeowner who's behind

What do you say to a homeowner who's behind on the mortgage?

Start by asking if it's OK to talk. Say that you're an agent, not an attorney, and that you can't promise how it turns out. Then ask what they want, what notices they've received and whether any has a deadline. End by agreeing on one small next step.

What should an agent never say to a homeowner who's behind?

Never promise a result. Don't say you can stop the foreclosure, that the bank will approve a sale, that their credit won't be hurt or that they won't owe anything after a sale. If you don't know, say so.

Should an agent give a homeowner legal advice?

No. Legal questions go to an attorney. The CFPB says a homeowner who is facing imminent foreclosure or has been served with legal papers may need an attorney. [1]

Where can a homeowner get free help?

HUD-approved housing counseling agencies provide foreclosure prevention counseling free of charge. [1] The CFPB's tool can find agencies near the homeowner, and the HOPE Hotline, (888) 995-HOPE (4673), is open 24 hours a day. [1][2]

What if the homeowner says they got a notice of default?

Get the exact title, who sent it and the date. The name means different things in different states. In some it's a recorded notice that is an early step in foreclosure. [3] In others it's a warning letter from the lender. [4] Check the county records and ask your broker or an attorney how it works where you work.

10Try this on your next call

Practice before you need it. Grab a friend or coworker and run through the five steps out loud, with them playing a homeowner who's behind on payments. Then switch roles. You'll find out quickly which questions feel natural and which ones need to be put in your own words.

Before your next real homeowner call, write down your first three questions and keep them in front of you.

Who we are

KW Default Solutions (KWDS) helps Keller Williams agents find and handle listings tied to default. That includes homeowners behind on the mortgage, short sales, bank-owned homes and homes owned by companies or investors. We also train agents to do this work.

If you're working with a homeowner who's behind on payments and want a second set of eyes, reach out to the KWDS team. We're happy to help.

Sources

1. What is a HUD-approved housing counseling agency, and how can they help me? Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (checked October 29, 2026)
2. Find a housing counselor. Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (checked October 29, 2026)
3. Your rights in a nonjudicial foreclosure. California Courts Self-Help Guide (a California example only; checked October 29, 2026)
4. Facing Mortgage Foreclosure. Minnesota Attorney General (a Minnesota example only; checked October 29, 2026)

This article is general education for real estate professionals. It isn't legal advice, and rules vary by state, loan type and situation. The sample call is made up, and all names and numbers in it are fictional.